I am sorry if I expressed myself so badly, as I can’t remember ever being understood in a way so contrary to my intention.
The overarching point is that people who are confident in who they are (because they truly know themselves) cannot be overawed or intimidated by the arrogant. I cited “highly accomplished” people (emphasis added) as an example because they are the ones most likely to have a good self-image and high confidence. However, it is not an exclusive club, and life is not a zero-sum game. Everyone surviving in adult life is accomplished in some way, and as I have already stated, I firmly believe that everyone has the potential to excel at something. The tragedy is that many people don’t realize that and even engage in negative self-talk because they don’t know their own potential or have been abused into thinking badly of themselves. Of course, many people have also had enormous obstacles put in their way. For example:
For two or three years in childhood I had a close friend who had an abusive father and alcoholic mother. The father abandoned them, and his mother took up with another abuser, whom I actually met. They moved away, and I lost contact. I saw him again, however, in high school, where he hung out with a bad crowd and had turned into quite a slob and a slacker. Then in his senior year, he transformed himself, whether on his own or with help I don’t know. I had my last conversation with him at this time and learned that he was in a school-to-work program, spending only about a third of the day in school. In the evenings he was taking classes at a business school of some kind. The curtain falls again for about 40 years, and then he wrote a post, full of good cheer to his schoolmates, on the alumni web site. He had become a very successful businessman, and in his later years became a popular motivational speaker at business conferences. I find his story inspirational because I know so well the road he traveled, and I find validation in it for my belief that everyone is capable of excellence at something.
I also cited the example of “those who have faced death”—not “fighters,” because fighting has nothing to do with it. Everyone might face death at one or more times in their life, and we all do as the end approaches. Doing so is the ultimate sobering experience, because it puts things in a new perspective (so that the childish displays of the arrogant are seen as trivial).
There is no “rest.” I believe “know thyself” is a grayscale journey, not a black and white endeavor. Some (usually the young) have just begun, many are somewhere on the road of self-understanding, and many have reached their destination (although I suppose the journey may go on forever if one continues to probe oneself). At no time have I implied that the OP was unduly resentful and certainly not arrogant. Indeed, I think I agree with the OP more than anyone in this thread. However, even justified resentment is a negative emotion that can be self-defeating, so I think it is helpful to point out a better alternative.
None of this is offered as a scold, but as armor against the arrogant.
