Go Jokes 😆

Who is not allowed to become a member of go / weiqi / baduk library?

Answer

A bookkeeper.

Conversation between a 25 kyu and a 9 dan

“Master, I have beaten a 24 kyu. Have I become stronger?”
“It may be so, but strength is relative. If the player possesses inner balance, his rank counts for nothing.”
“Are you saying that if I find this inner balance I could even beat a 23 kyu?”
“And more. I’ve seen 25 kyu beat 20 kyu, and those same 20 kyu beat 15 kyu, and so on and so on, up to the highest ranks. So if a 25 kyu can beat a 20 kyu who can beat a 15 kyu, and so on and so, what is even a kyu? As I said, strength is relative.”
“Are you saying that with a strong will I could even beat you?”
“No.”

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When you go out for a night of drinking, greet everyone you meet with a hearty Scottish welcome. That way, if someone doesn’t reciprocate and you later get in a bar fight with that person, it’ll be Aye vs no Aye.

source

my excuses

why some people may find this funny
why some people may not

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Got a good laugh out of me.

Congrats on finally being stupid :wink:

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I’m against the idea of changing the name of OGS to ORS (Online Rengo Server).

How about a complete rebrand? Online Rengo, Go And Some More Stuff server…

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Why should St. George be the patron saint of go players?

Answer Because he killed the dragon.
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Why did the overweight person start playing go as a leisure activity?

Answer Because he wanted to reduce.
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But he would have chosen a game in which stones are eaten :thinking: He doesn’t have to kill anything if he really wants to reduce!

To clarify, I have nothing against overweight people, reducing is not always the solution (to the health problems it can cause), and killing groups is the best thing about this game

This is questionable.
Best thing about go is balance, for me.
Knowing that excess can be punished.
Managing the right amount of self care and initiative.
Killing a group can be satisfying but keeping the score difference under 5 pts along the entire game is precious. My opinion, of course.

Back to the joke, I think that it’s perfectly working: reduction may be the wrong answer sometimes, but definitely there are many people that want to reduce their weight.
So, playing go trying to reduce is a nice double meaning.

Eating sones, on the other hand, would help increasing weight, so it’s suited for gluttonous people and for those who are skinny.

Shall we open a new “Go Jokes pedantry” thread? :smiley:

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Go wash your mouth with green soap and write 100 times “I will not make pedantry jokes again”.

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image

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Okay. But then it is not writing it 100 times but 1000 times :smiley:

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I apologise in advance …

What do you call this situation, when there’s two cats and you can’t decide who to pet?

answer

Miai

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Thanks for getting this thread back on topic.

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What do you call a ko battle you lose?

Answer

A fiasko

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What I was thinking of

A colossus.

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This leads to a new go joke. :smiley:

What do you call a an all board ko battle you lose?

Answer

A kolossus.

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What I was thinking of:

Answer A collapse
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