I’m curious whether you eventually want to play Go with this friend, or if you came here just to discuss COVID with someone…
I’m itching to send this to claramelapple so, so bad…
With an attitude like this, I expect that you will remain lonely.
I had to Google it!
And I am a tiktok user!!
If you (generic “you”) can’t stand to have your opinions challenged every now and than, your opinions are probably worthless. Change my view!
Go out, don’t try to rely on internet too much. The world is full of real life.
If people around you are too familiar, travel.
I organize the democratic go game, open to anyone and whenever, hope to meet you there too. If you want to talk about some go, it’s a place for you.
It could have been phrased better, but I think what he was trying to say (principle of charity) was that we also have freedom of association, and while he’s happy to have a genuine conversation with someone regarding COVID even if their opinions differ, he’s not interested in debating the relative merits of different degrees of free speech.
Maybe you are correct, but from what I read (and I read the post several times!) I would never have guessed that this is his line of thinking.
Well, let’s hope he finds a friend.
I found a Reddit thread for finding friends and have made some progress there. Thank you all for your input and I hope you all are doing well ^_-
P.S. If anyone needs a friend, I am available! Though I don’t expect anything as I doubt a lot of teenagers play Go so no pressure
Okay, apparently you are a teenager.
But why the focus on teenagers?
There might be also very interesting adults, who could make perfect friends.
And since you don’t know anything about a digital friend, you might already have been chatting to non teenagers.
BTW there are some teenagers on OGS.
@Dhaumyric1 I am likely about your age, maybe slightly older. While, for privacy and safety reasons, I don’t feel comfortable with using email to converse (mainly because I would rather keep that info private), I would be more than happy to get to know you better by playing a game of Go and chatting via OGS. Feel free to let me know if you would like to move forward with that.
I understand that it has been a trying time for all of us and I want to let you know that, for the most part, I always try to respect the viewpoints of others and try to understand where a given person is coming from, even though I may often disagree. That being said, I have no problem with a constructive and civil argument. I can think of quite a few examples off of the top of my head where I have actually changed my views on something (to some extent or another) due to conversing with and or reading topics within these forums, along with talking to others casually in a game of Go. This is not always the case, but you learn a lot by talking to people of different backgrounds.
Most of the people on these forums are grown adults that should absolutely be respected by you and I, even if we seriously disagree with them. Many are some of the most intelligent people I know (from what I can gather) and so it would be extremely rude to simply try to shut them down in a disrespectful way. I learn a lot from their thoughts, and I am sure you will do the same if you choose to speak and play Go with them.
I hope you and your family are well!!
I myself feel always a bit ashamed to hear someone calling for friendship (especially because of lonelyness) and not answering.
The thing is that I put some distance with online relationships, I’m more interested in real life. But that doesn’t induce some disrespect for all the nice people I meet here.
Hope the best in your quest.
I agree that real-life relationships are far more important than anything online.
…but if, for whatever reason, real-life relationships don’t go well for you for a while, then imho it can be extremely helpful to find friends online.
Agreed. In my case, I live a secluded life. I don’t hang around a lot of people and my family and I kind of steer clear of society and the crap they may bring. And especially with COVID, I don’t get a lot of opportunities to go and find someone to hangout with.
The sad thing with online friends though is they sometimes just disappear. For the last two months, I have talked to 13 people on Reddit. Only 3, have stuck around.
One doesn’t really talk a lot and has to be poked with a stick sometimes.
The second is cool but has parents that are… controlling? Really strict? I don’t know. The second is also really closed-minded and has said again and again that their beliefs will not change regardless of the information I give them, which is frustrating.
But the third… They are my favorite of the three. They are really nice and understanding, they are open-minded, and we have a lot in common. And she talks! I think out of everyone I have met, she has talked to me the most; not just because she actually responds to my replies but also because she really replies !
And my Dad also likes her, which is rare. My Dad doesn’t think highly of a lot of people. A lot of people have hurt him throughout his life, including my Mom’s side of family. And a lot of people are close-minded and judgmental. So he kind of doesn’t like people as a whole for the exception of those who actually stick around and want to be his friend (which so far is no one).
So when I say, “my Dad likes her”… that actually means something. We also did a writing challenge together about a month or two ago and my Dad is getting ready to give us some pointers and teach us more on writing and how to do it properly.
Anyway, I haven’t met a lot of people who actually talked me. The second person I mentioned gave lengthily responses, but not at the level of the third person. Haze_with_a_Z I think is the only other person who actually lengthily replies to my messages.
Because I am a teenager and want to find friends my own age. And you never know when an adult could be some kind of predator or something. Plus, they are more capable of doing harm to me than a teenager can. And I feel more comfortable talking to someone my own age than to someone older than me. I mean no offense if any of you who are adults, that is just my “teenager” reasoning.
That sounds nice and all and I agree with the showing respect part, but what does that look like? As I said in that part about my Dad, a lot of people are close-minded and judgmental. A lot of times, if a person doesn’t agree with what you are saying they will try to “correct” you. Now it is those moments that will show, or help paint a picture of, who those people are as human beings.
Now I am not saying that I am better than thou or what not. I myself am guilty of trying to change someone’s beliefs and opinions. But there is a difference between simply showing people your information and trying to explain your beliefs surrounding said information and outright going out of your way to tell them “the” truth. My brother, who is very much like my father, has taken a lot of verbal beatings by our Mom’s family for his beliefs, even from our Mom herself!. And my Dad, who is very intelligent and has studied people ever since he was a teenager so he wouldn’t get hurt by them, says a lot of people are like my Mom and her family. So knowing all that, I don’t want to deal with closed-minded judgmental people who believe they have to correct someone if they have beliefs and opinions that is not their own.
I have not desire to talk about COVID. I want nothing to do with COVID and my opinions regarding COVID will surely be targeted.
That sounds really nice and all, but I want to talk to people about life. Get to know someone. Not just talk and interact. I don’t see that as a valuable way to spend my time. But thanks for the suggestion @Vsotvep!
Honestly I don’t think the USA is what it stood for anymore. You should watch The Dictator. What the protagonist is fighting for is very much like what the USA is becoming, if not already what it is.
As I said, I have no desire to talk about COVID.
If you really want to know what I believe, read this short sentence. But please don't badger about it
I think COVID is a dumb hoax fabricated by the government (oh wait and Bill Gates).
Ok I understand why. I sound very close-minded and judgmental.
That was in fact phrased wrong. That was not the message I wanted to give nor the image I meant to paint myself as. I am sorry for the mix up .
I can relate to this entirely.
I think that there can definitely can be extremely dangerous things to watch for and stay away from with both teenagers and adults. The key is caution and discernment with strong critical thinking skills in my opinion.
This is something that I ponder frequently and am very aware of. And yes, I agree that with many matters regarding opinions and complex topics that they should not be forced upon someone in a way that rudely stamps the “truth” as something absolutely correct from a given person. But, at the end of the day, it something for basically everyone to work on, as I myself can be very guilty of it at times. People want to be heard, and can consequently get hostile at times.
This is more true than most people realize these days. Freedom of speech is suppressed in all too many ways in America now. I personally am afraid we are headed for the dirty consequences of Marxist ideologies in upcoming decades if things don’t swap around quickly. But a lot of people would disagree with that to some extent, or entirely. I just prefer to look at the situation from a historical perspective instead of the theoretically good-looking side of things.
It is an overused statement, but appearances are often deceiving.
Not quite how I would look at it, but believe me when I say that I am one of the very few on here that would be considered as “leaning” more towards that side of things than the alternative.
A) You expressed the exact same mindset earlier, so how do you justify finding find your own behaviour frustrating, when exhibited by other people?
B) Why would you want to change their opinions/beliefs? Are you try to befriend people or preach to them? Friends and pulpit positions are mutually exclusive.
If you want some general advice on the whole “having friends” thing, in my personal experience the following things matters:
A) Being earnest and respecting and liking each other for what you are (“a friend is someone that knows everything about you and still likes you”)
B) Sharing time and experiences together (which is why online friendships and real life friendships after the age of 25 are more fickle)
C) Helping each other without keeping tabs on who helped who the most.
Do notice that having the same religious and political beliefs does not make my list at all… if they disagree with you that is actually even better. That is far more useful than having a mirror of yourself fueling an echo chamber.
My Dad doesn’t think highly of a lot of people.
No old person does
That sounds really nice and all, but I want to talk to people about life. Get to know someone. Not just talk and interact. I don’t see that as a valuable way to spend my time.
You do realise that in order to get to a point where people will talk with you about life (their own or in general the important things in it), you have to “talk and interact” with them first, a lot, right?
A person that straight away talks about such issues is either lying or has a personality that will blurt ANYTHING out without any filter. Either way, not a person to talk about life, unless you want everyone to know what you confided in them.
Honestly I don’t think the USA is what it stood for anymore.
Oh, I am dying to ask “which is?”
I cannot wait for the answer to that
I think COVID is a dumb hoax fabricated by the government (oh wait and Bill Gates).
Here we go again with the “Marxism”
You do realise that Karl Marx actually wrote articles in newspapers about that topic, in defense of freedom of press/speech, right?
Meanwhile in the “capitalist” part or our reality:
“Feeling maligned by the media, Donald Trump is threatening to weaken First Amendment protections for reporters if he were president and make it easier for him to sue them.”
Consider this last segment as a “simply showing people your information” … I did not really present any personal opinion on that matter. Just facts … now you two have some thinking to do on your own.
It’s also funny how “socialist” countries in Northwest Europe seem to have more Press Freedom than the more conservative countries in Eastern Europe.
Be careful not to conflate “people that are close-minded” with “people I disagree with.” If you don’t converse with anyone you disagree with about major issues then you’re just building yourself an echo chamber. People aren’t close-minded just because they disagree with you about issues like COVID, or are unwilling to change their views to match yours about the issue.
From what I have read so far I think your father has had a lot of bad experiences and has shared his point of view with you. Maybe you too have had them, but I think it depends on your social bubble whether people are closed minded or not.
If you are just looking for a friend you can search for blogs or forums (like this) about your hobbies, but if you want to talk to open-minded people try be open-minded yourself and do something new, so your social bubble changes and you meet different people.
And you can write to a pen pal.