So I have been playing for like 3 months. And I’m triying to introduce my father in the game. He liked it, in fact he requested a Yellow Mountain’s yunzi stones and goban set for father’s day.
The thing is. I have played with him 9×9 with 2 stones handicap, and he can won like that. But I don’t know who to help him enter the 19×19 world, wich is were the greatest fun is imo. I don’t particulary like 13×13, but he says he stills feel safer there.
So (besides still playing 13×13, because that may be anoying for me but still seems pretty logical by now) I would appreciate sugestions that may help to make the game more enjoyable for us both. For instance: should I play bad moves on purpose? Should I gave him a greater handicap the greater the game? Should I abandon altogether the idea of triying to teach him anithing when I have still such a low level myself?
I recommend just playing a bunch of games with him, at whatever board sizes you both wish to play, and maybe experiment with varying levels of handicap (instead of trying to play intentionally bad moves).
I would guess that your father may care more about spending time with you than becoming a strong Go player. So, maybe worry less about being the best possible teacher and just focus on enjoying the activity together. Eventually, I think he may naturally want to try 19x19, once he gets a bit more experienced at other board sizes.
Sounds like a lot of fun (and quality time). Enjoy it together!
Don’t rush him to 19x19. I’ve been playing for years, and still find almost as much joy in 9x9 as 19x19.
One other thing I think you might notice. As you continue your Go journey, you might find that it becomes harder and harder to bring family and friends with you. Handicap will help bridge the gap for a while, but eventually you may be better served by playing people who are internally motivated to play the game, and have made it to a similar level. Try to find a go club near you and meet other players!
I’m not trying to discourage teaching at all, please continue teaching your father if he is interested. But for playing partners, you will have better luck joining the Go community 
It’s not always easy to share knowledge with a family member because of pride and such. If you have something to say on the game you can still try. I dunno like what is a ladder, closing boundaries…
Anyway go for fun at first be relax, you think to be weak but you are much stronger already as a beginner.
Thank you all for your kind replies. I didn’t want to make a text wall, so maybe I was scarce in details. As @yebellz and @Issa_T pointed, probably my father mainly wants quality time. But he also would like to learn.
We used to play hnefatafl and we liked it better than chess, because the simplicity let us try to make strategies, while chess variety of movements was not our cup of tea. But we leave it because we quickly realize it was a way to unnbalanced game. Now when we discovered go, with the combination of a very simple rule set and a balanced and deep game it loocked like a no brainer. However, go was much more than we bargained for, but (my obssesive personality to blame) I started to play a lot online, and now I’m stronger than him. In that regard, @benjito you are right, I play online and I’m lucky enough to have a go club where I can play, and I enjoy both things a lot. But I also want to share the game with my father, if possible.
So I’ll try to be more precise with my question. First, @Groin, you are partially right and partially wrong. I know enough things to teach my father, but I don’t know how to explain them. The thing is that up until now I have been learning mainly through playing a lot (although Mark5000 beginner tutorial were also great resources). So it gets hard to explain certain things (for instance, I try to explain why 3.4 is better than 4.4 for beginners but I’m not very clear, or I explain him that you need to make a base but I can not explain him why because I am still learning the concept miself). But he want’s me to teach him, in fact he told me about how his late uncle overplayed his late aunt at chess and how he dosen’t want me to be like he was (he gave the “check mate in 4 moves” vibe).
What I see in my father’s why of playing. He tries to occupy too much space, and when I cut him (not a very dramaticall cut, just a “I can’t afford to let you make such a huge mojo” thing) he gets nervous. And then he either contacts like crazy, triying to capture and usually selfatariying himself in the process or he start making dragons that easily developt into onigiris). I want to help him play better, but I don’t know who.
Well, it seems to me you’re very capable of teaching your father some of the basics. Your comments make a lot of sense. Take him and the game wherever it leads you both!
PS: I’m actually a bit jealous 
Perhaps
- Challenge him with life and death problems
- Learn some proverbs,and whenever you see him play a move that violates a proverb, point it out.
Play out a pro game together.
The age-old question. Do you go full force on a beginner killing their every group, or do you hold back? I have been teaching a beginner recently and I find myself thinking this question almost every move. The answer that I chose for myself is, even if you see you could kill their group, or play a slick tesuji, it may not be the best for them. There are countless mistakes I wish to correct but would it stick in the long run? Better then to just stick to a secret mini-learning plan you keep in your head, and help your beginner improve on only 2 or 3 points, plus any other they may ask you directly. And for the rest: relax by thinking it’s a teaching game, it does not matter if you lose. I try to challenge myself by finding creative strong moves when my beginner slips so instead of destroying them locally I keep a safe lead. It’s a great way to put myself in positions I would normally never experience in my games as well. Play the suboptimal move so that the best spot is free for them to take and rejoice if they do see it and play there. And if I am safely ahead, stop taking points, even avoiding taking double ataris even if they are there for the taking, to avoid winning with a 150 points lead. Anyway, YMMV.
I play by the secret rule of trying to win without ever invading. If they invade too deep I will kill, but otherwise when playing teaching games I try to just win with efficient moves.
The answer I chose for myself is to use a handicap that’s big enough for them to actually win even when I do my best to win. IME for me that means 7-8 stones handicap when playing a novice on 9x9.
One advantage of this method is that you can actually measure progress as they gradually need fewer handicap stones to win.
I’ll try some of your advices @jlt, @ronin3, @BHydden. After reading, and writing the questions (thus reflecting about the problem), I think maybe I am too focused in getting him to play at my exact same level. Also I am probably been a bit pridefull miself, and that convined with a lack of confidence in my skills is leading miself to play too agresively. Perhaps I should try to learn from this games, and care less about whether if I lose a game or two.
That’s what I also do – I don’t mind losing when playing against high handicap, and when teaching a beginner, and I want them to have the gratification of a victory because I want them to stick with the game 